Four Sided Quarter
by Nerielle Tu
Summary: He hates her, he loves her, he watches her. She hates him, she loves him, she notices him. He envies her, he loves him, he watches him. He is a monster, they are all different. Nnoitra/Neliel/Tesla/Szayel


Four Sided Quarter

Neliel never hated him. As much as she would have liked to disregard him there was a web she had become entangled in. She could not hate or even fully dislike the brutish arrancar. No, Neliel could only belittle him and crush his ego. _He deserves such a punishment._ She reassures herself, shrugging off the possibility that she might just be protecting him out of her own selfish desires, not out of Aizen's need for him as an Espada.

Her sword is at her side. She says that she will not draw it against him, but ignores the many times she already has. She even ignores the reasons she doesn't wish to fight him. "What a fool you are, Nnoitra Jiruga"

_She scolds him_.

"I ain't a damn fool," he spits vulgarly. This has become a time where fighting is absent and conversation fills the void. "The fuck do you know?" His words reek of offense and distaste, but his face is plastered with a crude grin. He is used to her torment and he takes it with little heart. "Such vulgarity, Nnoitra."

_She is tempted to say he is better than that. _

His mind is blank to her. As much as she would like to assume what he is thinking, it's one of these moments that always makes her realize he is a closed book to her. She has asked him questions before and to her surprise he has always answered. It was during these exchanges that there was no discontent. Yet Neliel knows what he says about her. She knows she is a _disgusting bitch _and a _hag _and a _slut _and she knows most of all that she

_thinks she's a fucking human._

Only Neliel can look into his eyes at this moment as he is grinning and nearly laugh her own laugh. Because Neliel Tu Oderschvank is no human, she only wishes she was one. Every time she wishes she was one she recoils and finds herself fastened to the crude existence of a hollow. Were it not for Nnoitra she would not retain her arrancar mindset. Yet no one knows this, because Neliel Tu Oderschvank is a very closed book.

"So what, Neliel." he finally responds. "How childish of you. Surely you can understand you lose even more respect from people when you treat them so vulgarly." Nnoitra looks to her and shrugs. "So fuckin' what? Do you think I give a fuck about what pricks like Szayel think about me?" Neliel looks away into the empty sands of Hueco Mundo and then asks him a question.

"Surely there is something that makes you happy?" Neliel asks this with complete certainty that he will say the battle.

"I don't measure the worth of this fuckin' place with a word like happy." Nnoitra responded. Neliel sighed. "Surely there must be something that drives you that way."

"It's not happiness I want, Neliel. I want fucking satisfaction."

_She respected his answer._

_She envied it._

- -

There were a lot of things Nnoitra wanted he couldn't have. He wanted to be the strongest, but he denied that he was not. He wanted to be recognized as the strongest, which no one would do. Most of all Nnoitra wanted her. It was sickening to think of the ways he wanted her. As he had walked away unscathed from another pointless talking situation, he could only find himself recalling the sickening ways he wanted to have her.

_He wanted her to accept him. _

Nnoitra was hardly fit to be called a man. He was sure if he was a Shinigami he would not feel the constant urge to destroy anything remotely calming or sentimental in his life. He did know that no matter where he existed, he would always crave power and the recognition he deserved for finally having that power. At the moment Nnoitra had neither, and it infuriated him.

_Just like she did. _

There were a lot of things Nnoitra wanted he couldn't have. He wanted to be the strongest, but he denied that he was not. He wanted to be recognized as the strongest, which no one would do. Most of all Nnoitra wanted her. It was sickening to think of the ways he wanted her. As he had walked away unscathed from another pointless talking situation, he could only find himself recalling the sickening ways he wanted to have her.

_Maybe he would rip out her eyes. Maybe he would break her arms. Maybe he would step on her and drag her through mud. He wanted to crush that stupid fucking mask and teach her a lesson. He wanted to teach her that being a fake human was a bunch of shit. She wasn't a human, she was a fucking hollow. He wanted to see her bleed, perhaps even to cry. _

What Nnoitra didn't know how to comprehend were the different ways he did want to have her. His depraved desire to splatter her blood was one thing, but there was so much more. **Fucking disgusting** he growled at himself. **What a fucking disgusting woman.** The irony was so great he wanted to laugh at it, laugh at himself. **Maybe even more than me.**

_Sometimes there were visions of her body. Her fucking naked body, and he could only be enticed into those visions. It wasn't like they were oversexed. Fuck? They'd all been robbed of their desire to fuck. The Shinigami probably felt it but the arrancar could only muse in their jokes. Sexuality was __disgusting, fucking was disgusting. Nnoitra wanted to fuck Neliel. He wanted to regard it as pure lust- but what the fuck drove lust in Las Noches, in Hueco Mundo? What the fuck was it based behind? There weren't children, reproduction, all that fucking shit. That's why no one else in Hueco Mundo felt shit. _

So Nnoitra went to Szayel Aporro Granz. Maybe it was cowardly to go to a man like Szayel. He didn't think so. Nnoitra regarded his actions as low, but perhaps the most 'humane' solution for someone like a hollow. He wasn't supposed to feel that way. He was supposed to be logical and normal, but he wasn't supposed to want to fuck anyone. He did not feel guilt for it, in truth he actually enjoyed it. But maybe that made him less of a hollow, of a warrior. **Would I be lettin' her win?** He asked himself.

"Ah, Nnoitra-sama," Szayel Aporro greeted him, mocking him. "How can I help you? Have you been hurt by Neliel again?" Nnoitra scoffed. "Guess you're finally goin' fuckin' blind ya cocky little bitch." Szayel just adjusted his glasses and smiled widely at Nnoitra. "How pleasant of you, Nnoitra-_sama_" he said with a 'pleasant' tone. Nnoitra rolled his eyes.

"What do you want, Nnoitra?" he said as he dropped the pleasantries.

"To get rid of someone."

_Nnoitra could still see her body naked in his mind. He could feel her beauty in his dream, because he was intoxicated by it. He felt something else there, probably the worst of all three things. The sort of thing that you don't fucking feel in this place. She touched him in his dream, as he was fucking her. Sometimes her body and how it felt to him was all that mattered, but then he'd see her lips clearly and her hair messy, and her eyes looking at him in some sort of way he couldn't stand but __**had to. **__And for once that cold and dark figure had been a warm and enticing figure, one he had no desire to reject. _

- -

Tesla was always the first and last one to know. Nnoitra had often told him by his actions long after he had already known. There was the rare occasion in which Tesla no longer contained his eagerness to follow his master. At first he had always been sure Nnoitra was just fighting, and so he tracked him down in hopes of watching. Nnoitra had always been mystifying in battle.

He saw his master with Neliel, one of the Espada. He figured they would fight, but they did no such thing. Instead they talked, they talked about things that mattered, and sometimes things that didn't. Tesla had felt a sense of disappointment swell in his stomach. He had started to follow Nnoitra more frequently. The few times he had been discovered he was punched around and then left alone. Sometimes nothing happened, which felt even worse.

_He envied Neliel. He envied that Nnoitra looked like there was something different in her. The same way he had felt about Nnoitra-sama when he met him. _

Szayel Aporro had requested his presence. Tesla complied, though he was tempted to use his privilege as a fraccion to decline. He went all the same, knowing that Szayel Aporro never called anyone to his room unless they were disposable or important. Tesla thought about it for a moment and decided that even if Nnoitra considered him disposable, he doubted Szayel would kill him. Szayel didn't know the way his master's mind worked.

"Ah, Tesla," he said in a mocking tone, "So it seems you came." Tesla didn't ever quite understand Szayel Aporro. He has never been one to get too close to him, and Szayel had never bothered with Tesla. "Of course." Tesla does not regard him with respect because he is no longer an Espada. He doesn't know exactly what it was that made him lose his job but he knows he doesn't have to respect him.

"You know," he said as he motioned for Tesla to take a seat in front of him. "You would be interested to know exactly why I've called you here." his tone was condescending and Tesla's expression remained uninterested and uncaring. "Is that so?" he responded in a monotone voice. Szayel had a cracked smile on his face and Tesla found it disgusting. He found Szayel completely disgusting.

_He is disgusted because Szayel is everything Nnoitra is not. There is no one more displeasant than one who stands on other's legs and uses their arms to kill. Even his beloved yet cruel Nnoitra sama is not as low as this bastard. _

"Nnoitra-_sama_ asked me to call you here." he said with the brightest grin. Tesla could feel his heart sink a little, "If Nnoitra-sama wanted me to do business with you surely he'd..." he couldn't really retort. "Nnoitra-_sama_ Can't do this, only I can. So obviously he wouldn't do fuck about it." he looked at Tesla and Tesla felt a gleaming hatred in his throat.

_Tesla can feel Nnoitra's disregard for him and it burns him. Each and every time it burns him, even though it should not. That is just Nnoitra-sama's way._

Szayel spun his chair around and sat to his desk. Tesla could feel his joy, and Tesla wanted more than anything to leave. But he had no way of knowing of if Nnoitra had really asked for his assistance. Then suddenly Szayel spoke, "How far would you go for Nnoitra?" his voice was riddled with excitement. With certainty Tesla answered, "As far as I possibly could. I would give my life." Szayel turned back to him with a jar in his hand.

"Your eye will do."

Tesla looks to him and for a moment loses his calm. "What nonesence are you speaking Szayel Aporro?" Szayel let out a haughty grin and leaned closer to Tesla. "Your beloved Nnoitra-sama has requested I get rid of Neliel-sama! Isn't that delightful?!" He took one of Tesla's hands in his and made him hold the jar. "But I need your eye Tesla. Your eye. It's all in the formula!" Tesla looked to him and quivered.

_Tesla cannot deny the urge to get rid of Neliel. He is jealous of her! He is jealous of the attention that Nnoitra-sama pays to Neliel-sama. He is so jealous he has tried to become equally enticed, he has tried to bask in that radiant light that Nnoitra wants her to put out so he can have her. Yet even as he learns to enjoy the fluid motions she makes as she strikes his master down, he cannot stop being jealous of her. _

"What ridiculous formula would require my eye?" he questions. Szayel looks at him and brings his hands to rest against his cheek. "I can't do it without your eye Tesla-kun. Don't you want to make Nnoitra happy? Don't you want that bitch to pay for humiliating him?"

_Tesla disagrees with Szayel. Szayel doesn't understand him at all. He does not hate Neliel, he is simply jealous of her. He doesn't want her to pay because he is sure without Neliel, Nnoitra would have never spared him. He would not be alive to be jealous of her. He is so thankful that he feels guilty for his contempt. He is a fickle person determined to be loyal. He is sure above all things that he wants to be loyal to Nnoitra-sama. _

"For Nnoitra-sama..I will give my eye" he says sternly. Szayel grins and looks to him. "I hope you'll understand Tesla-kun...I don't have the time nor patience for a medical extraction." Szayel does not waste time. His clammy barren hand, he did not know why he took off his gloves, is moving towards Tesla's eye socket.

_Tesla will do it for Nnoitra-sama. _

He screams and Szayel watches as the blood flows down his face. The jar he had intended to put the eye in is crushed in Tesla's frustration and agony. Szayel casually stands and puts the eye in a jar. He hands Tesla bandages and assists him in wrapping them around his empty socket. He gives Tesla to medicine and Tesla both hates and appreciates Szayel, simply for giving him the opportunity to help Nnoitra-sama.

Tesla leaves the room and Szayel cackles. He takes the eye he just took and throws it in the garbage. He told Nnoitra he would need something from Tesla, so Tesla would believe he had done good. What a fool he was, Szayel thought to himself, what a fool.

- -

Szayel has had things work out for him. Nnoitra came to him for assistance, Tesla gave up an eye, and Neliel accepted his invitation to his room. So there she sat in front of him drinking tea. The irony was how this had all played into his hands, how it had all worked for him. If anything it gave him something to laugh at.

_Szayel is a monster. He feels no lust, no love, nothing but what a hollow should. He fucks people and he plays them simply for the sake of fucking with their emotions. Szayel enjoys it. _

"Why did you request my presence Szayel Aporro?" Neliel speaks with a tone of annoyance. Of all of the people he has played he understands Neliel the least. He was hoping she would come so he could figure her out. This was probably his greatest 'conquest'. Taking down the biggest three figures of emotion and decay in what hollows were. He loved it so much. "I have no desire to share pleasantries with you. Please get to the point so I might be on my way."

Szayel twists his lips into a grin, "Ah but Neliel-sama, such coldness! I have no desire to simply speak with you, but perhaps I just have not felt like enlightening you yet!" Szayel just wants to explore her. He wants to take advantage of her in a way that he did like Tesla. If he can do this he will be able to break Nnoitra as well, he will win. It's so delightful.

_He feels no warmth in the idea of fucking her. He just envisions it to make the image of her squirming a very clear one. He likes to see beautiful women squirm, he's never been sure why. _

Neliel sips on her tea and looks at him firmly. She puts her tea down and does something Szayel does not expect. "Szayel Aporro, I have no interest in being your friend or chatting. You have made it clear that's all that I will obtain from this endeavor. Please do not make this a habit or I will not return to your quarters again."

Szayel is genuinely displeased. He wants to see Neliel squirm, but she won't stay for the party. If Tesla can stay by the mention of Nnoitra then why can't she stay based on his own company, the company of a man she detests and could destroy if this went her way. He is upset, doesn't that tempt her?

Neliel stands and begins to walk towards the door. Szayel is frustrated but he stands and looks to her as she leaves. "Wait," he notions, but she does not. She keeps walking, so Szayel reaches out to her. He takes a handful of her hair and pulls on it. Neliel does not falter, she draws her sword and within an instant it's at his throat. She has a look in her eyes.

_Szayel fears her because she does not fear him. His actions don't disturb her. He is nothing to her. _

"Szayel Aporro Granz. I am the reason you are no longer an Espada. I have stripped you of your title and if you continue to be a nuisance I will do everything in my power to have you stripped of more. I don't wish for your kind to touch me, the kind of filth that thinks it's special for being filth. The ground Nnoitra Jiruga tarnishes and wrecks holds more value than your very life. Release me and never attempt such pleasantries with me again." Szayel does. Neliel leaves.

_He fucking hates her. He hates her. Because of her he can't break the chain. He cannot destroy Nnoitra if he cannot destroy Neliel's mind. He could destroy her body, he would, but there's no way he can destroy her mind. He hates her. Even Tesla's loss is devalued by her._

- -

She feels as if she is dying. Neliel is falling from an impossible height and she feels the most betrayed she has ever felt. The man she needed to remind her she was an arrancar, that she was who she was, has taken her current life from her. She regrets believing in him, but she regrets most of all that she is the one who wove herself such a fate.

She still can't believe she would kill him. She is blinded by rage but she already feels herself clinging to reasons why she cannot kill him.

He is watching her and he already feels remorse. He is convincing himself that she will be back but when she falls and transforms he sees she will not. He is suddenly blinded by those images of her naked body, of her strange emotions. He attempted to strangle the life from those illusions but he only brought them on himself harder.

He hates her but he wishes she'd come fucking back. He can never admit it so he simply believes in her.

Tesla could not watch, he could not come. His eye is now covered by an eyepatch and he feels satisfied only in that he believed in himself. He somehow feels as if it was only a ploy, he has felt that way ever since. He tells himself that it doesn't matter what was done with the eye, it was taken in Nnoitra-sama's name.

He feels guilt for Neliel. He is still jealous of her.

Szayel Aporro Granz can do nothing. He laughs and grins and keeps his cool but he has lost. He will continue his endeavor in other games, in other specimens. He is disappointed but he will persevere. But this game is over.

Over.


End file.
